IBB: Sorry, I’m Not Interested

I received a call very late Sunday night. It was an international recruitment agent and they wanted to know if I would be interested in being our highly respected and influential former Military President’s new spokesperson. I did not think twice before I refused the offer and hung up. To make sure such does not come my way again, I have changed my number. See wahala o, these people are just very wicked and mischievous. Didn’t they see what happened or is still happening to my friend the Prince? This Prince has found himself in the middle of a whirlwind.

As I write, (Tuesday morning), I am just seeing a report that his arrest has been ordered. Whether they will arrest him or not is something I cannot say at this juncture. By the time you will be reading this over a cup of coffee if you are Gabriel Ogbechie, or over a plate of Afang and Fufu if you are Chike Ogeah, the whole saga like everything Nigerian would have simmered down and we would have moved on to the next issue. But to the actors and people like us who they are trying to drag into the matter will continue to feel the after-effects. But let me ask, will an experienced Spokesman who has been speaking for as long as I can remember, now wake up and issue such a powerful statement on his own without his principal’s knowledge? Now we do not even know which one to believe again with all this information flying around. They have said, IBB himself has come out to confirm the statement, despite another statement denying the first one. Mohammed, IBB’s nice son has also been dragged into the matter and then, stories of arrest or no arrest. You see why this spokesman work is not the best career move for me at this point. But there is a question, I want to ask o, why is arrest even coming up at all, shouldn’t it be IBB in whose name the ‘’fake’’ statement was issued that should be shouting libel or is it slander? Na Edward Koiki say I should ask this question o.

Olisa Metuh – Strecher and Ambulance Talk
Well, you know I can look for trouble and as my mother always reminds me, I really do not have the mind for the trouble when it eventually comes. But that will still not stop me from putting my mouth in a beehive. Last night, I watched my friend being stretchered into the court in a sad state. This stripping of the dignity of a man of that stature is really sad. I am not saying anything o. In fact, I am not the one writing this column. It is my fingers. I caught glimpse of his eyes and for that split second my heart broke. I cried. I swear, I truly cried. Olisa was a young handsome lawyer when I met him in Onikan long time ago. He was brilliant and had a beautiful wife. He was nationalistic and used to educate me on the intricacies of Nigerian politics. When he emerged Vice Chairman for the South East in PDP, he called and talked about his political sagacity. He was excited about his future and that of Nigeria. Today, he is being publicly humiliated in this manner and that has brought tears to my eyes. I do not know if we can comment on this matter being that there is a subsisting case in court. I am just looking at it from the point of human dignity. If a man shows cause that he is not physically fit for an appearance, I think he should be given that leeway to get himself in better shape for his appearance. I watched a documentary on the Boston bomber; at the point of their arrest, despite all the atrocities they had committed and were facing the death sentence, they were given all their rights and the best of medical attention. So na beg, as a small boy and someone who does not understand the intricacies of the law or those he may have offended, I really beg that no Nigerian, talk less of Olisa Metuh, should be publicly humiliated like that again under any circumstances. I am not fighting or shouting o. I am pleading. It is not good. God bless us all. Thank you. I am not in the country as I write. Let me know when it will be safe to return or make I kuku just remain for Uyo untill the coast is clear. Na wa.

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